Bad idea: Petting zoos at the office are the latest perk for stressed-out employees

Get your own fucking pet, and keep it out of the office.

Do any of youse understand how bacteria and viruses move around?

Chris Delaney typically unwinds from his job at Discovery Communications by taking leisurely weekend drives or flipping through stacks of vinyl at used record stores. But on a recent midweek afternoon, the broadcast ingest operator was releasing his stress — right there at work — by stroking a bearded dragon, a household lizard with thankfully inert spikes.

Salmonella factory.

“He’s very mellow,” Delaney said of the coldblooded creature resting on his lap. “Applying a warm hand puts this guy in a good mood.”

At the office animal party for the over-My Little Pony set, the good vibrations were flowing in both directions. How could you tell? Well, Norbert didn’t puff up his body and deploy his defenses, and Delaney didn’t rush to the medic with gouged fingertips. Quite the opposite: After finishing with Norbert, he requested a cuddle with another member of the visiting menagerie from Squeals on Wheels, a traveling petting zoo based in Potomac, Md.

“I think my favorite was the rabbit,” Delaney said after several failed attempts to soothe an African pygmy hedgehog named Tweedledee. (Or was it his brother, Tweedledum? Hard to know, because all hedgehogs act like twitchy acupuncturists.)

At the mention of his name, Rex the Velveteen rabbit attempted an escape, thumping his head against the cover of his wooden bin. Perhaps he needed an animal to hold, too.

In these anxious times, the embattled masses are resorting to all manner of succor. We meditate in the morning and drink a stiff one after work. Yell at traffic on the way to laughter yoga. Binge on Netflix all night and down cup after cup of pour-over coffee the next morning.

And now, with the rise of office animal parties, you can stroke a bunny, cradle a puppy or massage a tortoise’s neck on company time. If your colleagues or clients grow irate over unanswered emails, tell them to submit a complaint to Slinky, the blue-tongued skink.

You see a cute lizard, I see a Salmonella factory

We got two kittens from a rescue shelter. The 4-year-old and the 38-year-old are both enjoying the frantics of kittens. Even me.

And it allowed me to continue the discussion with Sorenne about bacteria and germs, and why sucking on her foot isn’t a great idea, and how kitties skink.blue.tongueclean themselves.

But there will be no reptiles in this house, except for the occasional small skink that enters by accident.

Parents and schools see cute pets; I see Salmonella factories.

Scott Weese of the University of Guelph chimes in with his recent Worms and Germs blog post, excerpts below:

Reptiles can be good pets in some situations. The key is understanding and accepting the risk. That involves understanding the risks associated with reptiles, understanding types of households where the risk is high and knowing what to do to reduce the risk.

Denial isn’t an effective infection control measure.

An interview in Oregon Live with the founder of International Reptile Rescue highlights this issue.

“And while reptiles have been associated with spreading salmonella (the CDC reports about 70,000 such cases a year) people are more likely to black kittycontract it from a dog, Hart says”

Uh…no. Reptiles are clearly high risk when it comes to Salmonella. Reptile contact has been clearly and repeatedly shown to be a risk factor for human salmonellosis. Dogs and cats (and various other animals) are potential sources of salmonellosis but while many more people have contact with dogs and cats, reptile contact is much more likely to result in Salmonella transmission. It only makes sense. Reptiles are at very high risk for shedding the bacterium. Dogs and cats rarely do (especially when they’re not fed raw meat).

“She’s never seen a case in the 30-plus years she’s been working with reptiles.”

Ok. So, since I’ve never actually seen influenza virus, I’ll never get the flu?

I know a lot of infectious disease physicians that have different experiences. In fact, it’s rare for me to talk to an infectious diseases physician without them providing details of various reptile-associated salmonellosis cases.

Talking about the risk of Salmonella shouldn’t be taken as insulting or a threat to reptile enthusiasts. People should accept that the risk is present and try to minimize it. The article actually has some of that useful information. “Just use common sense – wash hands thoroughly after handling the animal or its cage. A good rule of thumb is to keep hand sanitizer nearby. While white kittychildren under age 5 should avoid any contact with reptiles, Hart doesn’t advise snakes for children under age 7 or 8 for fear they could unwittingly harm the creature.”

Reducing the risk is common sense…keeping reptiles out of high risk environments and using basic hygiene and infection control practices.

However, any semblance of common sense goes out the door when a rescue like this offers programs where you can pay them to bring reptiles to daycares, pre-schools and schools. So much for young kids avoiding contact with reptiles.

Reptiles aren’t bad, they’re just bad in certain situations. Common sense needs to be more common.