Top Chef would be mildly entertaining with Charlie Sheen

I have no idea why those morons on Top Chef don’t use a thermometer.

During last night’s episode, Carla (right, exactly as shown) serves raw pork.

Judge Gail says, the center of my pork loin was pretty much completely raw.

Carla goes home

Thermometers would make them better cooks.

The Charlie factor is best summarized by music critic Lester Bangs in the film, Almost Famous:

Lester Bangs: The Doors? Jim Morrison? He’s a drunken buffoon posing as a poet.

Alice Wisdom: I like the Doors.

Lester Bangs: Give me the Guess Who. They got the courage to be drunken buffoons, which makes them poetic.