I buy my eggs at a new-age store so they’re safe; Barry’s got my back

One of the few pleasures in watching the movie, Baby Mama, is Steve Martin’s turn as Barry, the narcissistic, new-age genius who runs a Whole Foods-like organic supermarket chain, seen here transferring his success to v.p. and mama-to-be Tina Fey.

Stores like Whole Foods are easy to poke fun at because of their earnest idiocracy. But when a lifestyle choice crosses into public health outcomes, I stop snickering.

A buyer for one of these new-age stores sent the following to a supplier:

“I’m still not too crazy about pasteurized just as I’m not too crazy about ultra pasteurized dairy products in general. All one has to do is look at movement in our region regarding raw products, raw milk, and one quickly learns that our customers are for the less processed the better. In my 25+ years in the grocery business I don’t recall ever having eggs returned to the stores because they were bad. I haven’t refrigerated an egg in over 20 years myself personally, so although "salmonella" is currently getting a lot of press I’m not convinced that it really applies to eggs. When I worked at (another store) for nearly 13 years, we didn’t have one incident that I was aware of regarding "bad eggs," and we NEVER refrigerated them until the law passed making refrigeration mandatory. We must have sold a billion eggs in those 13 years.”

I wouldn’t want this guy purchasing eggs for me, and not just because of his annoying use of air quotes – what Jon Stewart calls dick fingers. Salmonella is getting more than a lot of press; it makes a lot of people barf. And eggs are a source.