But what’s Kastner doing with a Frank Zappa stache accessory?
Carol, give me a call, time to get stuff going. I can’t commiserate forever. And that hair.
A good lookin crew in 2004
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Category Archives: Wacky and Weird
Human poop scattered on Vancouver grass patch
Most people in Brisbane think Canada ends at Vancouver, or maybe Banff.
I always thought Vancouver was a dump, and still do.
So do others.
Kenneth Chan of Daily Hive writes, This is not a sight you would expect immediately across the street from the Sheraton Vancouver Wall Centre Hotel in downtown.
But if you look closely into a narrow patch of overgrown grass between the sidewalk and the bike lane on the south side of Helmcken Street between the laneway south of Burrard Street and Hornby Street, you will see excrement.
To be more precise, you will see hundreds of large pieces of what appears to be human poop.
Daily Hive was tipped off by a health worker at St. Paul’s Hospital who uses the sidewalk next to the grass patch on a regular basis to walk between their office and home.
“Human poop looks different than dog poop,” said the worker who wished to remain anonymous. “I have heard other people talking about the human poop too, mostly people walking in the area. I have also seen human poop in the garden outside my office and on a park bench that is outside the building, which is not something a dog would do.”
“It’s not like I’m counting or keeping track of the quantity, though I have to say this is the most poop-covered stretch of grass I have ever seen, but the accumulation seems to happen overnight.”
Is that a rat in your meat slicer or you just happy to see me
According to a food safety inspection report, an inspector found a live, large gray rat last week hiding in a meat slicer on a shelf in the back of Laurenzo’s Italian Market in North Miami Beach, Florida.
The inspector ordered a “stop use” on all food processing areas, the receiving area and on the receiving of food items.
My brain hurts: MRI edition
The first time I got an MRI was about four years ago in Tokyo after I passed out in a bowl of soup.
They didn’t find much.
Now that I randomly fall, my Australian doctor said go get a MRI.
So I just finished.
Some say it’s the booze, others say it’s CTE (chronic traumatic encephalapthy from too many pucks to the head, too many years playing linebacker where the coach said go kill the dude with the ball, the car crash, and too many falls as age advances.)
I don’t know what to expect, but remain optimistic for my partner and family.
Peace and love.
New Zealand’s Prime Minister and one of my daughters have babies
Emma started caring for Sorenne when she was an undergrad in child studies at Kansas State University about 9 years ago.
Emma writes she is so honoured to live in this country for so many reasons, and this is now definitely one of them. I highly recommend you Google Jacinda, because she’s doing lots of great things.
“This is The Prime Minister Of New Zealand, Jacinda Ardern. She’s 37. She’s the youngest female Head of Government in the world. She’s also the first western woman to give birth while in this position of power. Two days after the baby was born – with midwives, standard in NZ hospitals – she introduced her to the country during a press conference on the nightly news. It was really lovely. She named her Neve Te Aroha. Te Aroha means “The Love” in Māori. It represents all the names that were submitted (upon her request) from various tribes throughout the country, and was her attempt at capturing them all.
This is her and her partner, no, he’s not her husband (gasp!), walking to the press conference. He’s TV fishing show Host Clarke Gayford, and he will be staying at home with baby Neve when his lady goes back to running the country in 6 weeks. Clarke sports a snazzy sweater he picked up at the op-shop (second-hand store) in Gisborne, and thinks its just kinda logical and he gives up his day job to stay home and look after the baby.
A week after the birth on July 1st Jacinda introduced a $5 billion Families Package that she’d drafted on the floor of her friends house in Hastings – long before her pregnancy. It’s based on the knowledge that the first few years of a babies life are the most important. The package gives an extra $60 a week to families with new babies, and an extra $700 to families for winter heating costs as well (it’s cold as hell down there in the winter). It also increases the Paid Leave for new parents from 18 weeks to 22 weeks. She announced the details via Facebook live, from her couch, right after she’d finished breastfeeding the baby. Because Kiwis. Some of the most down-to-earth, no-drama-having, just-do-it kind of people you’ll ever meet.
And because Women. We really do know how to lead, and to do it well.
Yes, women do.
Amy’s been leading me around for the past five years as I go from drama to drama.
But as I get older I’m accepting that people won’t really care if I do an extra barfblog.com post before I go screaming into that night.
They may care about my family, so welcome to Jasper William Toth, brother to Emerson and second son of 2-of-4 daughter, Jaucelynn, back in Canada, who was born at 4:39 a.m. with the help of a midwife after a couple hours of labour at home.
Jaucelynn writes that Jasper is an impressive 9lbs 2oz and 21 inches long. We are all doing well and excited to start our journey as a family of four.
Jaucelynn was a 10-pounder.
Jasper is grandson #3 for me, and I couldn’t be prouder.
Funky blanket, Probably hot there.
Young and fearless
We were driving home from Florida – to escape the Canadian winter for a week – and back then we’d do the 24 hours with four kids in one shot in early 1996, and this song came on an American radio station.
I thought it was awesome.
Then I said, is that Sloan?
We didn’t have Google or phone tethering back then, so just argued, as you do.
This youthful enthusiasm encapsulates everything I miss about universities and why I hate the smothering bureaucracy they have become.
Don’t get shot in America. Live in Australia
Building on what John Oliver, then of the Daily Show, started five years ago, Damien Power writes in The New York Times there are more than 393 million civilian-owned firearms in the United States, which means there are more guns than people. If that makes you feel unsafe, visit Australia.
In Australia, it took one mass shooting in Port Arthur in 1996, where 35 people were killed, for the country to do something concrete about gun reform. The government adopted tighter gun control, banned semiautomatic weapons and started a mandatory gun buyback program.
The United States, meanwhile, has an average of nine mass shootings every 10 days, and 13,000 gun homicides a year. Gun violence is so rampant that China has warned its citizens about traveling here.
So if you’re interested in not getting shot to death and adorable koalas, Australia might be the place for you. Not being the target of snipers adds to the magic of visiting Down Under.
I’d add don’t barf and visit Aus, but food safety controls aren’t as good as gun controls.
Hillbilly beard: What bugs live in there?
I don’t know. Maybe some research has been done. But with highlifes and lowlifes adopting the look, especially in Australia, whenever I see one these, I can only think of this:
People pooping
We have one bathroom for the three of us, and my wife always says close the door, tightly, because I fart a lot when I pee.
That’s nothing compared to what other people are doing with poop.
A Florida man is currently facing charges after smearing human poop on food in the supermarket.
According to Click Orlando, Edwin Pierce — the Florida man in question — is a 31-year-old resident of Melbourne, Florida. Identified as homeless in his most recent booking, Pierce previously lived in a home in the area, according to Florida Sheriff’s Office, who make such information public upon a suspect’s arrest.
He was charged with petit theft and criminal mischief after he smeared human poop on food in the Family Dollar on 2200 Sarno Road in Melbourne.
It is unclear what the origin of said human poop was — whether it was Pierce’s, or it belonged to another Florida man, and the arresting officer didn’t bother to ask that pertinent question.
A mystery woman walked into a store in Washington, pooped, bought baby wipes and left.
It’s a disgusting story of a woman who went No. 2 in aisle one.
Employees at the Prospector Liquidation Store in Longview, Washington, said the woman walked into the business on Tuesday around noon, reports KATU-TV.
“I saw her come in. She said, ‘Hi,’ and went off shopping, and then I really didn’t see her again until she came up to check out,” said an employee.
The woman paid cash for some rubber gloves and, ironically, baby wipes. She then left the store – and she also left something behind — poop.
“It was just weird. After we’ve seen the video, we were like…and then she bought stuff,” said another worker. “I went over there by the tarps and you couldn’t miss it.”
When the workers reviewed surveillance video, they saw the woman, who was wearing medical scrubs, make her way to aisle one, squat and defecate. The employees said the woman didn’t even ask to use the bathroom.
And in Canada, a 24-year-old Belleville resident is waiting on a bail hearing Thursday after an overnight argument with his neighbour about cat feces, Belleville police say.
According to a press release, police were called to a Coleman Street address because a neighbour’s cat had defecated in another neighbour’s flower bed.
Police say the affected neighbour then shovelled up dog poop and flung it at the cat-owners.
The 24-year-old man is facing charges of mischief and breach of recognizance.
It’s a big old goofy world.
Sometimes if you’re nice to grad students, they are nice back – Chapman edition
Chapman bailed me out of jail on a bogus charge, and all grad students should go through the hell that must feel like: Oh, and because you’ve got a key, I can find a bright kid to pick the lock. It’s the basis of cryptography.
So me and Chapman and this student had a chat this morning about how she wants to do more work for us over the summer.
Don’t know if she’ll work out, I always figured the kids are moldable until about 5, after that it’s a crap shoot (mine have all turned out exceedingly well, despite their despicable parents).
For the first year Chapman worked in my lab, I didn’t know he existed, and now he’s the golden ginger boy of food safety.
The university may shut this idea down, so wat?
I always thought being a uni prof was to come up with novel ideas and be at home while raising kids.
Now it’s lotsa talk about research excellence, while spending your time on bureaucrat bullshit.
If I had to spend another weekly faculty meeting with 30 or more profs making 6 figures arguing the merits of a 25K per year admin type , I wouldn’t go postal, I’d turn the gun on myself.
I’m still an optimist, despite all my bullshit negativity to the contrary, and will always be there for a student, or anyone else who wants to learn.
Well played, Chapman.