As I devoured a 160F tip-sensitive thermometer verified hamburger this morning while watching Tampa beat New York in hockey playoffs, I was reminded that NY Times foodie Sam Sifton took 1,600 words last year to describe how to cook the ‘perfect burger’ and no mention of thermometers.

The Times wonders why it’s losing readers (and please, stop sending me the daily offers to resubscribe for almost nothing, it’s embarrassing).

Food porn always trumps food safety, until someone gets sick.

Bask in Memorial Day, my fellow U.S. citizens, remember those who gave and continue to give, and try not to make anyone barf.