Cow patty bingo, an American Red Cross fundraiser, had to be rescheduled to August 16 after two cows failed to poop. The cows wandered the bingo grid behind the third-base bleachers for 2 1/2 hours, but didn’t leave any patties behind, said Suzanne Phillips, a spokeswoman for the American Red Cross in Burlington.

I was visiting a close friend about a week ago and he sent me to the store to get some “poop pills” – a bag of dried prunes. He eats about 4 or 5 each morning while reading the paper. 

His mother is another constipation victim of the family. She was telling me she cannot afford to skip her daily “poopy shake”– a mixture of 8 different types of fiber that she mixes with orange juice. She eats a ton of fruits and vegetables, and has a wide variety of natural laxatives in the medicine cabinet. This is the most impressive one here (in Spanish, sorry)

Maybe these cows could call my friend or his mom for some advice.

Read the story at: the times news