There are no stupid questions only stupid people – UK edition

A new Reddit thread started by user MrTalkingDuck asks, “What is the dumbest 100% serious thing someone has said to you?”

South.Park_Mr.GarrisonMiddle_sized_Richard wrote: “I was once told that drug dogs at airports etc. were addicted to the drug they were looking for.

“So each airport has a heroin dog, cocaine dog and so on. This person was a university graduate.”

Aim_snap_fail added: “I used to work in a kitchen, and one of the pot washers was cleaning a slicer and not exactly being careful.

“I told him the correct way to do it, so he didn’t chance cutting any of his fingers.

“With a straight face and complete seriousness he told me he didn’t care if he cut his finger off… It would just grow back. Like a starfish.”

Redditor Yer_F*****_Now_Bud recalled: “I’ve been a cook for 15 years. One time a server asked me to rush a chicken breast she forgot to ring in.

“I said, ‘OK, it will be a few minutes, it’s still a bit raw.’ ‘Just give it to me, it’s fine,’ she says.

“I tell her I don’t feel like giving anyone salmonella poisoning today and she will have to wait.

“Her jaw drops and her face turns red. She rather belligerently shouts just give it to her because she’s losing tip money, then adds, ‘Besides, people don’t get salmonella from chicken, they get it from salmon. You’re a cook, you should know that by now.’”

Referring to famous physicist Stephen Hawking, who has motor neurone disease and relies on a speech-generating device to talk, MyUglyKitty divulged: “Stephen Hawking is British? But he doesn’t have an accent.” ~ me, unfortunately.”

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About Douglas Powell

A former professor of food safety and the publisher of barfblog.com, Powell is passionate about food, has five daughters, and is an OK goaltender in pickup hockey. Download Doug’s CV here. Dr. Douglas Powell editor, barfblog.com retired professor, food safety 3/289 Annerley Rd Annerley, Queensland 4103 dpowell29@gmail.com 61478222221 I am based in Brisbane, Australia, 15 hours ahead of Eastern Standard Time