I lost my passport. God hasn’t found it yet. I’m stuck in Dallas.

I blame the Catholics.

While flying from Manhattan to Dallas last night, on my way to Brisbane, my passport was misplaced. Thirty years of international travel and I do the one thing you should never do – lose a passport. I was having a pleasant enough chat with a fella who was telling me why Catholicism was the best of all religions; I was trying to be polite, and said I primarily viewed religion as a spectator sport – at least for me.

Most food safety is faith-based, and the lord wasn’t shining so bright on about 40 parishioners at Spring Lake Missionary Church who were sickened over the past two weeks.

The Pekin Times reports the Tazewell County Health Department is investigating the outbreak.

Kim Gudzinskas, the department’s weekend on-call nurse, said she only knew that no final determination has been made on the possible source and exact nature of the virus. Further information may be available today, she said.

Lacey said the illness was first noticed about two weeks ago. While he knew of no one hospitalized, the illness’s symptoms were strong.

Health department investigators told church members the illness possibly spread through both contact with a germ-laden surface or person and through the air.

I was having enough trouble learning Australian; now I’m gonna have to learn Texan.