I got up at 4:45 a.m. Sunday.

Just habit, how I roll, watching No Country for Old Men in the background, which really does improve with repeated viewings, like most Coen brothers movies.

While scouring the Internet I came across probably the worst infomercial ever. Bill Marler, your competition ain’t going to be knocking down the doors any time soon.

This Florida law firm has its own Internet infomercial. I’m thinking Dan Ackroyd selling a Bass-o-matic.

“What kind of bacteria do you hear about?

Another bacteria that can cause foodborne illness is the salmonella virus.”

Douche alert: Lawyer host — even I got my hair cut. And telling viewers to “shop at places with reputable reputations” is not a real mastery of the English language.