Take a dump on Trump: Poo Haiku for World Toilet Day

 

 

Take a dump on Trump

I won’t change my toilet’s name

Your poo orange too.

trumptoiletSaturday is World Toilet Day, a serious effort by the United Nations focusing on the fact that one-third of the world’s population — or 2.4 billion people —  have no toilet at home. A third of those people are children. They are vulnerable to disease, malnutrition and other major problems because there is no clean way of going to the bathroom where they live.

Marylou Tousignant of The Washington Post writes the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF) and other organizations want everyone in the world to have proper toilets and safe drinking water by 2030.

People living in present-day Scotland and Pakistan built the first indoor toilets about 4,500 years ago. Pipes carried the waste outdoors. Knossos palace, built 3,700 years ago on the island of Crete in the Mediterranean, had some of the first flush toilets. They used rainwater and water from nearby springs. A wooden seat kept users dry.

Medieval castles had toilets built high on an outside wall. There was a stone seat at the top, and gravity took care of the rest. Often the waste dropped into the castle moat. People living in towns, meanwhile, collected their waste in what were called chamber pots, and they emptied them by heaving the contents out a window. Public lavatories, which were not common at the time, were often just several toilet holes in a row built over a river.

In 1596, England’s Sir John Harington designed a flush toilet with a handle and a raised water tank. He said using it would leave rooms smelling sweet. He gave one to his godmother, Queen Elizabeth I, who didn’t like it. Instead, she used a pot in a box covered in velvet and trimmed with lace. The idea of an indoor flush toilet didn’t catch on until 200 years later.

The word “toilet” comes from the French “toile,” meaning “cloth.” It referred to the covering on a lady’s dressing table and, over time, to the dressing room itself and the primping that went on there. (Wealthy people in the 17th and 18th centuries often had rooms at home just for getting dressed.) In the 19th century, “toilet” got its modern meanings: the place where bathing and other private acts occur and the bowl into which human waste is deposited.

Over time, chamber pots and toilet bowls got fancier and fancier. One such pot, sold during the American Revolution, had an image of Britain’s King George III at the bottom of the bowl.

Thomas Jefferson, who used flush toilets while he was the U.S. ambassador to France in the 1780s, had three small rooms for toilets built at Monticello, his home in Virginia. But there is no proof that they were true flush toilets. And because most American homes did not have running water until a century later, the widespread use of flush toilets came later as well.

Chinese businessman Zhong Jiye will not give up the brand name on his Trump Toilet products, NBC News reports.

“We registered our company in 2002 and obtained approval from the trademark office in Beijing,” said Zhong, referring to Shenzhen Trump Industrial Company Limited, which mostly manufactures high-tech toilet seats. 

hanksy-dumptrump“If (U.S. President-elect Donald) Trump thinks our trademark violates his rights and interests, he can use legal methods because our company observes China’s laws,” CEO Zhong told NBC News, adding that he is prepared to defend his company’s legal rights to the Trump brand name.

In Chinese, the company name means “innovate universally.” 

Vicky Hallett of NPR reports that poetry may be one way of getting people to discuss diarrhea.

That’s the idea behind Poo Haiku, a competition created by Defeat DD, a campaign dedicated to the eradication of diarrheal disease.

Although everybody’s had the runs, it’s not something most folks talk about, says Hope Randall, digital communications officer for PATH’s Center for Vaccine Innovation and Access, which created DefeatDD to bring together resources on vaccines, nutrition, oral rehydration therapy, sanitation and more.

Kat Kelley of the Global Health Technologies Coalition, which references a recent study published in The Lancet:

Just six pathogens

But eighty percent of kids’

Diarrheal deaths.

Randall herself penned an entry:

A vicious cycle,

Gut damage, malnutrition

We can halt the churn.

And from Doug Powell:

Take a dump on Trump

I won’t change my toilet’s name

Is your poo orange too.

(Depends whether the word orange is one syllable or two.)

Everyone’s got a camera: Hamburger-buns-stored-next-to-toilet-at-Tennessee-Checkers edition

Customers at a local fast food restaurant in Bradley County say they found a disturbing scene over the weekend, hundreds of buns, just feet away from a public toilet

checkersIt all happened at a Checkers restaurant located off of 25th Street in North West Cleveland,TN. Pictures confirm the buns weren’t in the oven, they were in the bathroom, Saturday. Customers say this type of practice is unacceptable while health department officials called it a “public health emergency.” Tennessee Department of Health officials were on the scene within 24 hours to investigate. 

“That’s nasty, I don’t want to eat,” said customer T.C. Cooper. “I’m never going to eat there again.” 

Customers are now turning away from the Checkers in Cleveland after seeing the pictures another customer posted online. 
The video show several racks of hamburger buns sitting next to the toilet in the men’s bathroom.

“It’s just bad business, poor management and it’s disgusting,” said Cooper. 

Stephen Staley who manages a nearby McDonalds says he was visiting Checkers on Saturday when took the video. 

“My first thought was are they going to serve them and speechless other than that,” said Staley 

He says he took the video to keep others safe.

“I’ve been to get a serve-safe certificate and you learn about all of that stuff in that class,” said Staley. “Food safety is definitely a big priority in a restaurant.”

 He confronted the manager on duty about the buns being in the bathroom. 

“They said they were trying to get them out of there and inside of the restaurant,” said Staley. 

Staley told Channel 3 that he stayed on the property until employees moved the buns back inside more than an hour after his complaint. He then he called the Health Department’s emergency tip-line for help. 

A spokesperson for Checkers released a statement saying:

” The health and safety of our guests is our top priority and a bread delivery mistakenly left in the bathroom is completely unacceptable. The buns were misplaced during a delivery at the franchise-operated Checkers location in Cleveland, Tennessee, on Saturday, April 23, 2016, and when discovered, they were immediately disposed of by the restaurant team. The buns were never served, and the employees involved in the delivery have been disciplined.”
WRCBtv.com | Chattanooga News, Weather & Sports

Too cool for toilets: Jimmy Buffett fans leave buckets of poop at concert

Jimmy, ya gotta say something to your fans.

Last Saturday’s Jimmy Buffett concert in Mansfield, MA left a foul taste in everyone’s mouth. That’s because the legions of drunken retirees who make up Buffett’s fan base apparently like to make their own homemade toilets for these events, which they then leave, brimming with excrement, for some poor bastard to clean up.

jimmy.buffett.toiletAccording to police lieutenant Sam Thompson, the Parrotheads are just too rock n’ roll to use the designated bathrooms.

Local police chief Ronald Sellon called the leavings “unsanitary and just disrespectful. [T]he most common model is a 5-gallon bucket with its rim lined with a foam pool noodle for a seat, stashed inside a tent.”

Street food vendors in Hyderabad, India have some food safety issues

I’m a food truck kind of guy, but I prefer to eat from places that have to follow the basic rules of sanitation. In North Carolina mobile food vendors have to be linked up with a physical kitchen (for cooling and prepping food) and even then they are inspected. Keeping food safe in a truck can be done, but it takes vigilance and a sense of hazard identification.

And not using water from a toilet.1680787-poster-1280-water-reuse-graphic

Like what the Times of India reported about some street food vendors in Hyderabad, India.

Every sixth Hyderabadi taking street food is falling sick from food-borne infections (whoa, I’d like to see the data -ben), says a study that directly observed the hygienic practices followed by 500 food vendors and small restaurants in different parts of the city. 

The most common ailments reported by denizens after eating street food or ‘stale’ food served by some established restaurants are diarrhea, abdominal pain, nausea and vomiting, reveals a study released to mark the ‘food safety’ theme on World Health Day. 

And here’s why: The majority of street food vendors (423 out of 500 surveyed) were found drawing untreated water for cooking from nearby apartments, while only seven were using protective head cover. None were using protective gloves and almost all used nearby shops to dump their raw material overnight. 

“Our team, which also communicated with customers, came across around 50 vendors with tobacco addiction, leaving the remnants of the ash on the food being served,” said Dr K Suresh, president of Osmania Medical College Doctors’ Forum, who led the study. 

Worse, 15 out of 500 vendors were found drawing water for cooking from toilets of nearby apartments, while almost all were found to skip hand washing after a visit to the toilet or lavatory. This is what the 30-member team of MBBS undergraduates led by Dr Suresh found after analyzing data gathered from street- vendors from December-2014 to February-2015.

Top 10 UK toilets through time

A Scottish food safety friend sent along this story from English Heritage which has some great pics.

1. Housesteads Roman Fort, Hadrian’s Wall: All together now…

Toilet-bannerThe best preserved Roman loos in Britain are at Housesteads Roman Fort on Hadrian’s Wall. At its height, the fort was garrisoned by 800 men, who would use the loo block you can still see today. There weren’t any cubicles, so men sat side by side, free to gossip on the events of the day. They didn’t have loo roll either, so many used a sponge on a stick, washed and shared by many people.

Visit Housesteads Roman Fort

2. Old Sarum, Wiltshire: Luxury facilities, until you have to clean them…

These deep cesspits sat beneath the Norman castle at Old Sarum, probably underneath rooms reached from the main range, like private bathrooms. In the medieval period luxury castles were built with indoor toilets known as ‘garderobes’, and the waste dropped into a pit below. It was the job of the ‘Gongfarmer’ to remove it

Visit Old Sarum

3. Dover Castle, Kent: The royal wee

Henry II made sure that Dover Castle was well provided with garderobes. He had his own en-suite facilities off the principal bed-chamber. As with many castles of the era, chutes beneath the garderobes were built so that the waste fell into a pit which could be emptied from outside the building.

Visit Dover Castle

4. Goodrich Castle, Herefordshire: The toilet tower

At Goodrich Castle there’s a whole tower dedicated to doing your business.

Visit Goodrich Castle

5. Orford Castle, Suffolk: A Norman urinal

Garderobes are quite common in medieval castles, but urinals are a little more unusual. Henry II’s Orford Castlewas built as a show of royal power, and to guard the busy port of Orford.

Visit Orford Castle

6. Muchelney Abbey, Somerset: Thatched loo for monks

Many medieval abbey ruins across the country include the remains of the latrines, or ‘reredorter’ (meaning literally ‘at the back of the dormitory’), including Muchelney AbbeyCastle Acre Priory and Battle Abbey. At Muchelney the building survives with a thatched roof, making it the only one of its kind in Britain. The monks would enter the loo block via their dormitory and take their place in a cubicle – you can still see the fixings for the bench and partitions between each seat.

Visit Muchelney Abbey

7. Jewel Tower, London: The Privy Palace

A precious survival from the medieval Palace of Westminster, Jewel Tower was part of the ‘Privy Palace’, the residence of the medieval kings and their families from 11th to 16th century. It was well supplied with garderobes, with one on each of the three floors.

Visit Jewel Tower

8. Old Wardour Castle, Wiltshire: ‘A new discourse of a stale subject’

The forerunner to our modern flushing toilet was invented at Old Wardour Castle. The inventor Sir John Harington met with five others at the castle to discuss his idea for the first time in 1592.

Visit Old Wardour Castle

Thunderbox9. Audley End House, Essex: Feeling flush

Along with many other technological advancements, Audley End was one of the first country houses in England to have flushing toilets. The first of Joseph Bramah’s new hinged-valve water closets was purchased in 1775, and a further 4 were bought in 1785 at a cost equivalent to the wages of two servants for a whole year.

Visit Audley End

10. Brodsworth Hall, South Yorkshire: Thunderboxes

Inside the elegant Victorian country house of Brodsworth Hall almost everything has been left exactly as it was when it was still a family home. So as well as the grand furniture, there’s also everything from the commodes of the 1840s to a modern pink bathroom from the 1960s/70s.

Visit Brodsworth Hall

Proper handwashing, pooping require proper tools: Dirty school bathrooms give students diarrhea in Vietnam

And it’s not just Vietnam.

Dirty toilets and bathrooms gave 40 per cent of Ho Chi Minh City students diarrhea, according to UNICEF Viet Nam.

dirty.bathroomLast month, the city’s Health Department reported that 220 students at District 12’s Nguyen Khuyen Elementary School were unable to go to school, as they suffered a digestion-related disease caused by unclean school toilets. Two children in the southern city died in July from a similar condition.

The Ministry of Health reported 3,719 diarrhea cases in HCM City in the first six months of 2014 out of 301,570 nationwide in the first eight months.

School bathrooms and toilets in urban areas of the city are often in poor condition due to the large number of students and teachers that use them, as well as the lack of soap and fresh water for cleaning.

vietnam.ToiletThe problem is even worse in rural areas of HCM City, where schools have no bathrooms at all. In those areas, 27 per cent of children have to go to the toilet outside the school.

A chocolate toilet? A $133,000 bathroom suite made out of Belgian chocolate

When I think chocolate toilet, I’m thinking of some 50-something digestive issue that explodes way too fast.

la-chocolate-bathroom-suite-20140820-photos-001Bathrooms.com, a bathroom furniture retail site, and U.K.-based chocolatiers Choccywoccydoodah have gotten together to create a bathroom furnished with Belgian chocolate. The set is being advertised on Bathroomsweets.com, a site Bathrooms.com Chief Executive Ian Monk decided to create after seeing people frequently mispell suite as sweet.

“We realized that over a million British people searching for new bathrooms were popping ‘bathroom sweets,’ rather than ‘bathroom suites’ into their preferred search engines,” said Monk in a statement on Bathroomsweets.com. “The simple mistake caught our imagination, what if we created a bathroom suite, out of something sweet?”

The Maderno Sweet bathroom set includes a 210,000-calorie chocolate bidet, a 210,000-calorie chocolate sink, an 8 million-calorie chocolate tub and a 980,000-calorie chocolate toilet. The entire set has 9.4 million calories and is listed for sale on the site for $133,040. Or you can purchase the pieces individually. Everything is made fresh, so you can expect a two- to three-month wait time.

eaten, can be kept at room temperature for years. And you can add a layer of varnish if you’d like to preserve your sweet suite even longer.

Time in the toilet can taint a lovely night out for dinner

My first story as editor of the Ontarion, the University of Guelph student paper, in 1987, was based on rating local food service bathrooms.

dirtytoiletI went to local bars — and it cost the paper thousands in lost advertising revenue cause they didn’t like the results. This was before restaurant inspection disclosure.

Someone in New Zealand has picked up on the theme, writing that it’s amazing how there is no such thing as a toilet critic and, conversely, food critics abound.

Some of these restaurants, good ones even, have their toilets in impossible places, like through the kitchen and down a grimy flight of stairs, under another set of stairs.

Secondly, in the event of toilet paper being available, it is often more like sandpaper or, worse still, so brittle it’s unusable. One needn’t go into detail about what a mental and physical mess this can plop one into.

Thirdly, some toilets are so often in a state of splashed-out, soiled hideousness they cannot be used at all, but this is only speaking on the part of a male user of a male dunny. (We men tend to not notice the subtleties and nuances of bathroom tidiness, cleanliness and hygiene, as we’re a bit too tall to see down into the bowl, among other factors.) Even so, it evidently isn’t a punishable offence to leave a toilet in a state of multi-sensory stink by not cleaning up after oneself. In such instances, a greatly skilled toilet attendant could be very handy indeed. It would make dining life a lot more pleasant.

Fourth, a loo-user is frequently short-changed when it comes to washing and drying their hands, as the poor old Loser (Loo-user) regularly finds himself without soap or hot water, hand wipes, hand towels, a hand-dryer, or indeed any of the above. 

Toilet themed restaurant in LA craps out

It seems that customers really didn’t want to eat murky brown curry from a mini toilet.

Los Angeles’ Magic Restroom Café- a bathroom themed eatery- closed its doors over Memorial Day weekend.

Magic Restroom CaféThe Taiwanese food joint stayed open just eight months, Los Angeles Magazine reports. 

Customers with iron stomachs sat on individual porcelain thrones while dining on dishes like “smells like poop” (pork over rice) or “bloody number two” (strawberry-vanilla sundae). According to various Yelp reviews, the questionable fare at Magic Restroom Cafe was likely to induce some quality time on a real latrine. 

‘You could smell E. coli’ UK residents appalled by public toilet

Orpington toilets have been described as a ‘disgrace’ by a disgusted resident.

Sylvia Rowan, of Red Cedars Road, used the facilities near the Walnuts Shopping Centre off the High Street earlier this month and trainspotting-toiletwas appalled by what she found while a councillor blames the ‘animalistic behaviour of a sad minority’.

Mrs Rowan spoke to other concerned visitors, one of whom said she could “smell E.coli”.

The 76-year-old said:  “The only free toilet, which isn’t in a cafe, restaurant or bar is in a disgusting state, both in repair, cleanliness and hygiene. The smell was awful.

“One toilet was completely blocked (no note on the door) with floating matter on show. The men’s toilet is just as bad.

“I bumped into a lady there who said she was an environmentalist and she could smell E.coli.

“Being right next to a food establishment (Sainsbury’s) and a new library in the Walnuts Shopping Centre, this is a disgrace.”