Veg growers slam Woolies’ Jamie Oliver fee in Australia, as they should

Maybe celebtard chef Jamie Oliver has some sort of chromosomal disorder: regardless, he knows shit about food safety and freely admits he doesn’t read.

Jamie OliverSo why Woolworths would hire him to be their spokesthingy in Australia is beyond baffling.

Ausveg says growers have received requests from Woolworths to voluntarily pay a charge towards the costs of the new “Jamie’s Garden” promotion, equal to 40 cents a crate of produce sold to the supermarket.

While Woolworths says the request is voluntary, Ausveg national marketing manager Simon Coburn says growers are not in a position to say no.

“The growers feel like they are in a position that, if they were to say no, they are worried that their contracts would be reduced or terminated completely,” Mr Coburn said.

He said growers already paid a charge of 2.5 per cent to five per cent of their sales back to Woolworths to cover marketing costs, and the 40-cent charge was in addition to that.

The cost would range from a few thousand dollars to $250,000 for a grower, depending on the size of their contract, he said.

“Some are telling us they don’t have 40 cents left in their margins,” Mr Coburn said.

Woolworths said it was disappointed Ausveg and Senator Xenophon had not contacted the supermarket before going public.

chobani.yogurtIn other celebtard news, Gwyneth Paltrow says that water has feelings and can purify itself if you talk real nice to it.

And Greek yogurt giant Chobani says there’s no science in their yogurt; just mold that causes recalls.

Hamptons residents not pleased: Hep A restaurant offers to host Kardashians

Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian have found a site for their Dash store in The Hamptons.

Restauranteur Irma Herzog – whose Driver’s Seat Restaurant was investigated last year after an employee was diagnosed with hepatitis A – has risked the wrath of local residents in Southampton by “betraying” the upmarket village and leasing an art gallery space adjacent to her eatery to the sisters, who are planning to spend the summer in the resort for new reality show ‘Kourtney & Khloe Take The Hamptons’.

Kourtney-and-Khloe-Take-The-HamptonsOne outraged source told the New York Post newspaper: “Southamptonites are abuzz that Irma Herzog has betrayed their village . . . Will Irma also be bringing back another bout of hepatitis?

“Now she brings trash to her backyard. People are lining up to buy Irma’s property and get her out of town. She is a piranha.” 

Real Housewives of New York dogs drink too

In the latest episode of the Real Housewives of New York, Ramona is having a calendar shoot with her dog when Sonja shows up for a chat with her pup. The four are seated on an elegant couch when the guest doggy gets thirsty. Sonja, without missing a beat, offers her pooch her water glass and tells him kindly it is too early for champagne.

RHONY-dog RHONY-Ramona RHONY-Sonja

Ramona, polite but taken aback says, ”I have water right in the kitchen. You know, I hope you’re not going to drink from that after.”

Sonja replies distracted, “I miss Milou so much but this dog is just…” and sighs.

And then Sonja takes a drink from the same glass.

Perhaps she learned her etiquette from Real Housewife of Beverly Hills, Lisa.

Diego Sanchez blames beef tartare for loss to Myles Jury at UFC 171

Armchair epidemiologist and mixed martial arts fighter Diego Sanchez, says he lost a March 15 fight at UFC 171 in Dallas because of the food he ate the night before.

“I wasn’t myself last night,” Sanchez wrote on Twitter. “I sustained food poisoning from eating a beef tartar with raw quail egg as an appetizer at dinner. This was my own mistake. MMA: UFC 166-Melendez vs SanchezI ordered it thinking I need red meat but raw was the wrong choice. I threw up first at 2 am and all day fight day.”

Oscar fever? How about salami made from celebrity tissue

Bite Labs wants to grow meats from celebrity tissue to make into artisanal salami.

James Franco tastes “arrogant, distinctive, and completely undeniable. Jennifer Lawrence will have a “a charming and confident flavor profile.” And Kanye West salami is best paired celebrity.salamiwith “strong straight bourbon,” according to Bite Labs.

“Kevin” from Bite Labs wrote, “Our team is deeply interested in food culture, celebrity and media as well as thinking about the future,” in an e-mailed response to Vice’s Motherboard.

Kevin told Vice the current campaign is to develop a prototype of celebrity meat. Bite Labs is asking people to tweet at their favorite celebrities to be a salami.

Norovirus causes Canadian curlers to toss cookies as well as rocks

I took up curling for a year in my twenties as a social activity. Once a week I’d drive out to the club north of Guelph (that’s in Canada) and try not to fall as I slid 40lbs of granite down the ice while someone swept in front of it.

Well portrayed in the underrated Men With Brooms, curling remains the only athletic activity I’ve consumed beer while playing.brooms

It’s also the only sport I still have a shot at playing in the Olympics in (based on age).

When it is on television I’m strangely drawn to the yelling and shuffleboard like non-action. The Scotties Tournament of Hearts, Canada’s annual national women’s championships is currently taking place in Montreal and according to CBC, a norovirus outbreak is affecting teams and tournament officials.

The illness kept six players out of the morning draw, when Saskatchewan’s Stefanie Lawton (4-1) downed Quebec (1-6) 8-4 with only three players on her team.

Kesa Van Van Osch was the lone player missing in the afternoon, but then her lead Carley Sandwith had to quit after two ends, leaving them with only three.

Quebec was missing second Brittany O’Rourke in the morning. They got her back for the afternoon session, only to see her leave again after eight ends.

“She threw up in the third and the sixth ends, and finally got off the ice,” Allison Ross said of her teammate. “We’re in contamination mode.”

Did Britney barf on way to GMA appearance?

Good Morning America airs on TV here about 3:30 a.m., and I’m usually up so have it on in background, not for any content, but because the hosts and guests are all so attractive and tight, and it britney.barf.sep.1emakes we want to be better – or not care.

Britney Spears – she of the it’s-OK-to-change-my-kid’s-diaper-on-a-restaurant table –flew by helicopter to the Nevada desert to announce her Las Vegas shtick – and apparently barfed.

According to TMZ, Britney didn’t say if “sick” meant hurled … but it’s a reasonable conclusion.  She wore gigantic sunglasses in the dark night as “GMA’s” Sam Champion tried to get her animated.

Groundhog Day continues in UK; celebrity chefs still suck at food safety

In 1996, 23 people died in an E. coli O157 outbreak when Scotland’s former butcher-of-the-year used the same knives on raw and cooked beef.

In 2005, a five-year-old child died and 160 sickened after a butcher used the same vacuum packaging machine on raw and cooked beef.

Celebrity chef Marcus Wareing, who cooked  for the Queen on her 80th birthday and is star of BBC’s Great British Menu series failed his most big_bill_in_groundhog-731047recent restaurant inspection because he used the same vac-pak machine on raw and cooked product.

Dude, there’s this thing called the Internet; do some research before you speak.

We simply needed a vacuum-packing machine as we only had one. The FSA [Food Standards Agency] Guidance recommends two. We weren’t aware the regulations had changed last year. It was a technicality and we hold our hands up to it and purchased the new machine within a week.”

That’s the ignorance that led to the death of 5-year-old Mason Jones in 2005. It’s sorta been talked about. Too busy being a celebrity.

“To go from five stars to one star just for that seems  too radical, given my 25 years of kitchen experience.

“If they were taking Michelin stars away like this, well, it’s quite scary. My kitchen is a bloody Rolls-Royce that has customers in it, on my chef’s table, daily.  

“Food safety, and the health of my team and customers, is not something I would knowingly jeopardize.”

I’m just a dopy American/colonist but I knew about it eight years ago (actually, a lot longer).

Maybe give Hugh Pennington a call.

The chef runs a restaurant at London’s five-star Berkeley Hotel, where celebrity.chefsdiners are charged £115 for a dinner tasting menu.

Inspectors noted that at the time of their visit raw fish was stored above cooked crab in the fish fridge.

The council inspectors also said  it “was very disappointing to note that the record-keeping had ceased since April 2013.”

Goths mope more; Morrissey cancels South American tour, blames food poisoning

I don’t like the music of The Smiths. I do not like the music of Morrissey. It’s the soundtrack for depressed goth-wannabes.

But according to a website devoted to the music of the 1980s — which with rare exception absolutely sucked — Morrissey has postponed his entire South American tour after he and members of his team suffered “severe food poisoning,” an almost impossible-to-believe development morrissey_1399355cjust hours before the ex-Smiths singer was due to return to the stage for the first time since canceling his illness-plagued North American tour.
According to multiple media reports — including one in El Comercio, Peru’s largest newspaper — the promoter of what were to be the 14-date tour’s opening concerts tonight and Wednesday in Lima posted on Facebook late this afternoon that the entire tour was being postponed and is to be rescheduled in the coming months. New dates are to be announced “shortly.”

That message, translated to English, reads:
“Due to severe food poisoning suffered by the artist and of the accompanying equipment in Lima, Latin concerts scheduled for July and August will be postponed for the next months. The new dates will be communicated shortly. Morrissey and his team have been in Lima, Peru, from July 1. The artist was very excited about the upcoming shows and are very disappointed to have to postpone the dates.”
I’m not sure the equipment suffered food poisoning. But things get lost in translation.

According to a similar but lengthier statement posted by Movistar Arena in Santiago, Chile — where the former Smiths frontman was slated to perform a free concert July 26 — those sickened “have remained at rest and observation,” while Morrissey is returning to England to be under the care of his “personal physicians.”